I've had a few light bulb moments lately - sometimes you do learn the truth the hard way and sometimes criticism isn't all that bad, as long as its constructive and doesn't put someone else down for trying! I've been blogging for more than a year now and I started this blog because I've always been drawn and interested in everything related to beauty, elegance, looking elegant and sophisticated! Some posts I've been very proud of, others, I look back and think "I could have done better"! Recently, I recieved a comment about one of my recent posts that really hurt my feelings. In fact, I was 'fuming mad' when I read it and didn't even post the comment. However, since then I've had time to think, I've realized that by me even having a blog, I'm opening myself up hearing everyone's opinions - some that are awesome and some that are meant to be constructive criticism. I've always know that I have a very sensitive side, especially when it comes to taking criticism, but in the end, its actually a benefit to me to stop and 'learn' from what others have to say. I've been using this blog as a 'journey' into better-ing myself - journeying into my personal colour analysis, the looks I've been working on in my makeup course, style and fashion I really like etc etc. I've never claimed to be the best 'anything' - I'm just a person, blogging, sharing my journey - I'm sure I will create looks that others hate, I'm sure that some people will dislike some of my makeup looks that I create on others, but in the end, this is me just posting my journey and having fun. Do I appreciate peoples feedback and contructive criticism - Absolutely!!! Do I appreciate people being mean or voicing their opinion in a harsh, hurtful manner? No!!! However, this is the internet and I have to respect everyone's right to voice their opinion, especially when I have a public blog. I just wanted to say that yes, perhaps the comment I recieved was hurtful when I first read it, but could I learn from it? Was the 'meat of the comment' something I could take constructively and learn from? Yes! Part of the Journey is being open to 'hear' what others are saying to me, requesting for me to post and learning from the advice given. The only thing I ask, is to remember that I'm just being 'me' - I never claimed to be an amazing makeup artist or stylist or anything else - I'm just delivering a part of myself to those who are interested to hear what I have to say - I'd love to continue to hear you comments and get your feedback - It would just be nice to get constructive criticism that is 'constructive' - I'm more than willing to listen to what you have to say!!! On that note, I found a photo where I created a look months ago that I wanted to post and 'completely' forgot about - I don't even remember what makeup I used, but I do remember that the lipstick I used in 'Stength' by MAC and thats 'exactly' what I need in this point of my journey - Strenth to continue my passion and gain more knowedge and experience with makeup, Strength to continue to write about things that I feel represent what this blog is about, Strength to deal with the constuctive criticism and Strength to have confidence in myself in learn from each mistake I make and become a better person as a result, so here's to STRENGTH!!!
10 comments:
I appreciate your writing this blog. In public there can be criticism, but there's also this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmIPD2ymGpA&list=UUCvoAe__WFYMNAEN-C-CtYA&index=7&feature=plcp (you might've already seen this Wayne Goss video--about sums it up).
Just wanted to say, whether you post this or not, you are an inspiration!!!! I have learned so many positive things from you / your blog. I too have dealt with a ton of negativity in previous years and have just started to come out of my "cocoon" so to speak. Keep being yourself. You are beautiful, inside and out! :)
Thank you so much Wingsdesired - I really appreciate your comment and for opening up and sharing that with me! I hope that not only do you come out of your cocoon, but that you fly in abundance - we all need to let out spirits soar and inspire one another! You have just inspired me to keep pursuing my passion!!! Thank you!!!
Anonymous - thank you so much for sending me that link! Its really eye-opening and gives us all a lot to think about - I really appreciate it!
(NB: long comment)Hm... I get what you mean. And comments that are meant to be mean, are never worth your time.
Yet... I have a thin skin too, but the advice I have appreciated the most have seemed harsh at first. My worst nightmare is walking around in unflattering looks, while everyone's too polite to tell me that I look could have looked better.
And for me, many of the more subtle comments don't sink in. I need the shock. (Of course it's not so good if they're wrong in their advice.)
I think it's frustrating when people prioritise people's feelings over what's good for them in the long run.
So for my own part, I'm glad you're back to true autumn as it seemed as though you were using makeup to weaken your features in soft autumn, rather than enhancing them as you do in true autumn looks.
I actually told you this as an anonymous (before I sarted my own blog),but I hope I didn't offend you. I also complemented a true autumn look of yours at the same time, so I hope it made the criticism constructive.
Hi Runa,
Thank you for writing and yes, I agree with you - sometimes we need the 'shock' - its just that often the shock takes a while to set in and before we can see the contructive aspect behind the shock, there is often feelings of anger, denial etc etc. Thank you for not giving up on me being a TA - I'm really so happy to be back on track with my colours!!!
Aw, I'm sorry to hear that you received one of those typical awful, hurtful comments when you are so gentle and enthusiastic.
Let me guess: was it anonymous?
Well, it still hurts even when it's a drive-by shooting.
I admire that you are trying to learn from it, but, remember, the mean pricks are the 1% and the people who appreciate you are the 99%.
Everybody may have a different opinion but it is unacceptable to make a comment which hurts somebody's feelings in a very negative way. I believe there are much more well-wishing people who appreciate this blog and find it very interesting and useful. Thank you, Renata, for sharing with us your experience in the world of beauty and elegance!
I am so glad you chose to sit on the comment and pull it apart to see if you could learn something from it -- once the sting died down.
You have shared some very personal stories and some very parts of yourself on this blog. Please continue doing what you are doing.
The picture at the end of this post is beautiful. Your blog has helped me alot. I literally cannot wear any cool colors. I know I'm some combination of the autumn color family along with something else. I always wanted to wear the colors everyone else wore, pink and purple lipsticks, and whatnot. It wasn't until I did what you have done here...embraced ME, and started wearing what worked for me in makeup, that I became confident. Because I knew, even though alot of people hate brown lipstick, some of them think I look great in it, but most importantly, I like it enough to not care what the others think.
THanks for writing Anonymous - that is the absolute BEST place to be in - when you like yourself and your look enough to not care what others think - thats so awesome! Thanks for sharing your comment with me - means a lot!!!
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